dave6’s posterous -

Dear Abby

Dear Abby:

I have never written to you before, but I really need your advice. I have  suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me.  The usual signs; phone rings but if I answer, the caller hangs up. My wife has been going out with 'the girls' a lot recently although when I ask their  names she always says, just some friends from work, you don't know them.  I try to stay awake and look out for her when she comes home, but I usually fall asleep. Anyway, I have never broached the subject with my wife.  I think deep down I just did not want to know the truth, but last night she went out again and I decided to finally check on her. Around midnight, I hid in the garage behind my golf clubs so I could get a good view of the whole street when she arrived home from a night out with 'the girls.'  When she got out of the car she was buttoning up her blouse and she took her panties out of her purse and slipped them on.  It was at that moment, crouching behind my golf clubs, that I noticed a hairline crack where the grip meets the graphite shaft on my 3-wood.  Is this something I can fix myself or should I take it back to the pro-shop where I bought it?

 

   
Click here to download:
Dear_Abby.zip (52 KB)

 

 

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YouTube - US Soldiers in Iraq - The Ding Dong Song

It's really good to see they can still have fun over there..

This must be the Propaganda Division in action LOL :o)

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THE LATEST IN GOLF BALLS

I do not know who made this one, but it is the republicans who lost theirs in the last election..

-- 
Dave
Pablo Picasso  - "Computers are useless. They can only give you answers."

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Raisin Bread

Raisin Bread

 

A bakery owner hires a young female shop assistant who likes to wear very short skirts and thong panties. 
One day a young man enters the store, glances at the shop assistant and at the loaves of bread behind the counter. 
Noticing her short skirt and the location of the raisin bread, he has a brilliant idea. 
"I'd like some raisin bread please," the man says.

 

The shop assistant nods and climbs up a ladder to reach the raisin bread located on the very top shelf. 
The man standing almost directly beneath her is provided with an excellent view, just as he thought. 
When she descends the ladder, he decides that he had better get two loaves, as he is "having company for dinner."

 

As the shop assistant retrieves the second loaf of bread, 
one of the other male customers notices what's going on and requests his own loaf of raisin bread.

After many trips she is tired and irritated, and begins to wonder, "why the unusual interest in the raisin bread?"

Atop the ladder one more time, she looks down and glares at the men standing below. 
Then, she notices an elderly man standing amongst the crowd. 
Thinking that she can save herself a trip, she yells at the elderly man, 
"Is it raisin for you too?"

"No," stammers the old man, "but it's quivering a little."


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Don't try this at home..

(download)

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A legal question.......hope this isn't to risque for you .

Is this…… 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Is this statue-tory rape???

        Or is It just a moosedemeanor.....

 

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Montana Dog for Sale

A guy is driving around the back woods of  Montana  and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house: 'Talking Dog For Sale ' He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dogis in the backyard.

The guy goes into the backyard and sees a nice looking Labrador retriever sitting there.


'You talk?' he asks.
 


'Yep,' the Lab replies.
 



After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says 'So, what's your story?'
 
The Lab looks up and says, 'Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA. In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping.' 
'I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running. But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals.' 'I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired.' 

The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.
 


'Ten dollars,' the guy says..


'Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?'
 

'Because he's a liar. He never did any of that shit.

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Tattoo

This man had what he thought was the best tattoo in the world...






 
 
Until he went to prison.

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7 reasons not to take kids to the ZOO

             
Click here to download:
7_reasons_not_to_take_kids_to_.zip (321 KB)

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Grandma's peanuts

 

 John is out with his friends and stops by his grandmother's house for a visit.



There's a bowl of peanuts on the coffee table, 



And John and his friends start snacking on them. 



When they're ready to leave, his friends say, "Nice to meet you, ma'am, and thank you for the peanuts."     Grandma says, 



"You’re welcome. Ever since I lost my dentures, all I can do is suck the chocolate off of them."

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